


Reports of Our Deaths Weren't Exaggerated (But We Refused To Be Left Behind)

by BadgerQuest



Series: Almost True Friends [3]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Atlantis is the best city in the multiverse, Gen, Rodney is a popular topic for griping about in the expedition, a few Sparky hints but John's back on Earth with his team here, basically the whole fic is Elizabeth Evan & Carson chatting, only Carson doubts that he's Carson, set after the Legacy tie-in novels, thank you SGA for giving us THREE canon cases of just hiding not dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:15:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26690509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BadgerQuest/pseuds/BadgerQuest
Summary: After her welcome-back party to Atlantis, Elizabeth has a more laidback reunion with a thought-to-be-gone friend who had thought the same about her.
Relationships: Carson Beckett & Elizabeth Weir
Series: Almost True Friends [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1743940
Kudos: 7





	Reports of Our Deaths Weren't Exaggerated (But We Refused To Be Left Behind)

**Author's Note:**

> Evan Lorne showed up and refused to leave; he wasn’t intended to be here but I rolled with his insistence on being present. I’m not quite sure how much of the _Legacy_ novels I’ll accept as part of ‘my’ canon which is why I’m pretty vague on the previous events here. But I really needed the returned Carson and Elizabeth to have a chance to meet and catch up at least a little so I ended up having to write it myself.

Elizabeth was taking the long way to her guest quarters, being obliged by Major Lorne. They were both pretending that he wasn’t on guard duty as he guided her through the hallways. It was to be expected, though, after what she had been through. And Elizabeth would have tolerated far worse treatment in order to be back on Atlantis, if she was being honest with herself.

Running a hand lightly against a hallway, scarcely believing that she was _home_ again, she told Lorne, “It was a lovely welcome back party. I suspect I have you and Zelenka to thank for it?”

“Well, mostly.”

“Oh?” Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. The smile tugging at the corner of Lorne’s mouth hinted that there was a story there.

“Somebody else helped me and Radek with the party planning, but he opted out of attending. Still attracts enough attention of his own that he didn’t want to risk overshadowing you.”

Coming to a stop, Elizabeth quietly tried to ask, “You mean…?” yet she couldn’t bring herself to say his name.

“Uh-huh. Wanna go to the infirmary?”

“I believe we’re already most of the way there.” Elizabeth gave him a knowing look, making him duck his head sheepishly. She had noticed that was where he was leading her on this route, but had presumed it was in order to receive another medical check-up.

As they walked along, Elizabeth had to ask: “What do you mean, attention of his own?”

“Well, you know, he came back from the dead too. Admittedly there wasn’t really time for a welcome back party before he went in cryostasis, and then to Earth, then he did that interplanetary doctor thing for several months, and after that, well, you can guess.”

“So the expedition hasn’t really gotten a chance to reacclimate his return, particularly if there are doubts if he’s really himself.”

Lorne winced. “Don’t suggest that where McKay can hear you.”

“Oh, never,” she assured him, and meant it. She had only seen glimpses of Rodney’s grief, given his defensive mechanisms, but that had been enough to let her know how hard he had taken the loss of his closest friend. Having it undone must have been a shock to the whole expedition, but especially to him.

“It’s good to have the doc back in any capacity.”

“Not just to keep Rodney in check, I’m sure.”

Lorne made a considering noise, taking the remark more seriously than Elizabeth had meant it. “In both his and your absence, McKay actually kept himself in check most of the time. He, Radek, and I mostly were kept preoccupied with worrying about-”

Elizabeth gave him a look, letting him know it was already too late even before she said, “About how Sheppard was acting more aggressively to protect what and who he had left?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

It wasn’t like she had been _oblivious_ to that aspect of John, but that darkness having the primary goal of protecting her and the city they both adored? Well, Elizabeth could admit that she was both pragmatic and romantic enough to let that slide. And generally, she had a hard time being sympathetic towards those who had incurred John’s wrath, like Kolya.

Taking pity on John’s second-in-command, Elizabeth shifted the topic back to Rodney, who was always a ready conversation piece given his complicated and vibrant personality. If nothing else, he was a constant source of complaints. Lorne was much happier to ramble on about the chief of science’s antics than his own boss’s. Not that she was going to drop the ball regarding John’s behavior. Radek was one thing, typically lab-bound scientist that he was. For all his courage at his core, Rodney was often an anxious mess. Still, for him to be uneasy about Sheppard’s leadership was concerning, as she had thought that the two men had come to an accord even before her… leave of absence from the expedition.

Most worrisome was Lorne had taken the situation seriously. The black-haired soldier had gained experience in two galaxies and had been serving under John for years now. For him to be afraid for his boss now meant it was no small matter. In their interactions, John had seemed fine to her, but Elizabeth had to wonder if John had been putting his best foot forward in her presence, possibly unconsciously.

Elizabeth put aside such fretful thoughts as she and Lorne stepped into the infirmary, which was thankfully nearly empty. Lorne led the way to the CMO’s office, which had the door closed. Rapping twice, Lorne then opened it up so they could enter the admittedly cramped space.

But that wasn’t why Elizabeth paused at the doorway. Yes, she had been assured repeatedly that it was the truth, but it was still heart-stopping to see a living Carson again. He looked nearly as he had before the disaster of the first mandatory rest day; perhaps the laugh lines were a tad deeper, and Elizabeth thought she saw a few grey strands in his otherwise still-dark hair. Marks of the recent upheaval in his life, although Elizabeth was just pleased that he still had one to have upheaval in.

The coroners had refused to let her see the bodies after the two explosions, stating that Carson wouldn’t have forgiven them if he had let her see. When Elizabeth had tried to argue that she had seen the aftermath of explosions before, back when she was merely a diplomat on Earth, the coroners had pushed back that it was different when it was a close friend. Still, that had meant a lack of closure at the time, although Elizabeth could acknowledge that she herself had gone on to give even less closure to her friends.

Belatedly, she realized that Carson was staring right back at her with similar astonishment. Which was to be expected, as he had likely been told of her apparent death after having been rescued by Michael. Lorne had already taken one of the chairs before the desk so Elizabeth slid into the other. She would have to wait until a time when they were alone for Elizabeth to confess that one of her first returned memories was her grief over losing such a dear friend. It would be the absolute worst thing for the city gossip to learn, as they’d readily misconstrue the sentiment.

“No introductions necessary, I’m guessing,” Lorne teased them both, his eyes sparkling.

Elizabeth gave the major a fond if firm look. With a flush, Carson suddenly went to his electric kettle to pour them mugs of tea; still knowing how they took theirs, he didn’t bother with double-checking. He reassured them, “Don’t fret, it’s not caffeinated. Comes from the Genii homeworld, actually.”

“Is that so?”

“We’re uneasy allies with the Genii for now, so we finally have gotten around to trading with them like we originally intended.”

“No more nukes, I’m hoping.”

“That was your fault,” Carson told her dryly as he handed them their mugs, his own having already been at his elbow. The brush of their fingers against each other was further confirmation that was he was really here to Elizabeth, and his soft smile indicated he felt the same.

“I promise, that was a one-time thing,” Elizabeth giggled a bit, which widened his smile.

“It’s odd, seeing you two interact, it’s like seeing Janet and Sam again in a way,” Lorne noted wistfully. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I know Rodney is always compared to Sam-”

“A contest he’s always doomed to lose,” Elizabeth noted dryly. She felt more sorry for Rodney than usual on that front, given her own recent shortcomings when compared against Daniel’s similar series of events.

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” Lorne shook his head. “In other ways, Carson and Rodney remind me of Sam and Janet. I’d bet my position here that Sam would be at least _tempted_ by the chance to get Janet back, even if it was like how Rodney got Carson back.”

Elizabeth and Carson shared an uneasy look. Yes, the price had been high, possibly too high in Carson’s case based off what she had been told, but at least they were alive. Such exceptions were scarce in both the program and the expedition, and that was even before taking into account that Daniel was responsible for most of them.

“To get back on track, you two interacting, especially on a casual basis, it’s different from nearly anybody else here. Except maybe Teyla and you, ma’am, I guess.”

“The answer is simple, Evan,” Carson pointed out. “Elizabeth can only really see me and Teyla as peers rather than underlings. It’s part of why I’d bet a tin of shortbread that things didn’t work out between Elizabeth and that Branton bloke even before her apparent death.”

“Who?” Elizabeth blinked and shook her head a bit. She tried to dredge up any memories as she sipped at the tea, which tasted somewhere between strawberries and peaches, to no avail. “I’m sorry, I’m guessing some memories haven’t come back yet.”

“Aye, I both know the feeling and rest my case.”

“But then why don’t you and Teyla have a similar dynamic, doc?” argued Lorne.

“As Rodney would say, I’m a witch doctor. Such people are highly regarded across the Pegasus Galaxy, what with the Wraith's enforced cap on technological advancements. It’s not just _militaristic_ technology that gets stunted in such cases. Teyla grew up knowing to respect people with my sort of knowledge.”

“This is why we need a more thorough anthropological department,” Lorne groused. “We’ve just been so busy trying to keep the Wraith from taking over the galaxy that we’ve barely managed to set up alliances so we can get food, let alone do extensive research just for the hell of it.”

“If the Milky Way Galaxy is any indication, don’t your breath,” Carson noted wryly. “Over a decade since the first Abydos mission and the teams’ first priority remains combat.”

Lorne groaned and drank some tea. “Well, maybe the stalemate will last long enough that we can actually get some of the-” He glanced over at her before finishing, “the stuff done that the expedition originally intended to do.”

Elizabeth hid a smile by drinking more tea. It was old-fashioned of the soldiers to avoid swearing in front of her, but it was a small enough hill that she didn’t want to die on it. Besides, she’d much rather have them defending her ‘honor’ over them disrespecting her.

Leaning back in his chair, Carson took a long swallow of his tea. “That’d be right lovely, but I think I have to side with Rodney’s typical pessimism here.”

“When hasn’t Rodney been catastrophizing?” Elizabeth commented dryly.

“Well, once he was done freaking out, Rodney basically went la-la-la to drown out anybody who said that this Carson was a trap, a liar, or was just going to die on us again,” Lorne observed.

“To be fair, he was right.”

“Let’s not tell him that.”

“I’m pretty sure he already knows,” Carson laughed, nearly spilling his tea in the process.

“Well, let’s just not tell him again then,” Lorne instructed the other man, but both of them were grinning.

Elizabeth shook her head a bit. “I missed this.”

“Well, we missed you,” Carson asserted.

“Hey, I missed both of you. I mean, maybe not as much as some other people, but I did.”

“Look, Rodney just has more feelings than a normal person and less ability to cope with feelings than a normal person. It results in messes a bloody lot.”

Tartly Lorne went, “A goddamn solar system blowing up goes beyond a mere mess.”

“Aye, well,” Carson shrugged helplessly instead of continuing, unable to refute the comment but equally unwilling to insult his best friend.

“Speaking of Rodney, how soon do you think it’ll be before he’s gloating to his teammates that he was the one who got rescued by me?” Elizabeth mused.

To her surprise, Lorne winced. “Honestly, ma’am? Never. McKay’s probably well aware that when Ascended, Jackson aided O’Neill and Teal’c but not Carter. Could be that Jackson was fibbing, but in his case, he smoothed things over with her by claiming that she had never gotten into serious enough trouble to justify him pushing the envelope on the intervention front.”

“In other words, his inferiority complex regarding her is going to flare up again.” Elizabeth pinched the bridge of her nose, distantly noticing that Carson had gone to refill his mug, which underscored the seriousness of the issue.

“Maybe not as badly as in the past, but yes,” Lorne sighed. “Hopefully his teammates won’t make matters worse.”

“Teyla and Ronon won’t, but…” Carson trailed off meaningfully. “A certain somebody is going to be jealous and take it out on Rodney.”

Elizabeth flushed despite herself. “That wasn’t my intention!”

“By now, we three should be bloody well aware that intentions don’t prevent consequences,” Carson pushed back firmly.

“Uh, please keep in mind that I need to have plausible deniability about my CO’s intentions towards the former expedition leader,” Lorne interjected.

Elizabeth asked, “So you’re not involved in whatever betting pool is going on?”

“Neither of us is, same as Radek. We’re all considered to have too much inside information to be fairly involved in whatever betting pool there is for our little band at the top of the expedition chain of command.” Carson made a grumpy face. “But if I find out which people bet on Rodney and Jennifer breaking up within a year’s time…”

“I mean-” Lorne broke off when Carson crossed his arms and glared at him.

Elizabeth sipped her tea to keep from smirking; the only times Carson’s core of adamant being revealed weren’t funny was when she was the one up against it.

“I hope that I get the chance to meet Torren soon,” Elizabeth commented to break the tension. “It’s strange to realize that I’ve been… away long enough for Teyla to carry a baby to term and that baby to be trying to walk and talk now. Same for Ford and his family, I suppose, all things considered.”

Elizabeth wasn’t surprised by the brief flicker in Carson’s eyes, but she decided that would have to be a topic for when they were actually alone. Besides, Carson regrouped after a moment, too soon for her to push the point.

“Aye, the bairn grew by leaps and bounds between my visits,” Carson shook his head. “And it took me by surprise to learn why Michael had taken Teyla prisoner, although in a twisted way I’m almost grateful that he did so, since that led to me being rescued.”

“Same mixed feelings here, doc,” Lorne reassured him.

Sipping at his tea, Carson noted, “I’m lucky you all accepted me as Carson, instead of telling me to stop, because I don’t think I could have.”

“You’re you. Trust me, we would have noticed by now if that weren’t the case,” Lorne told him.

Carson smiled, but it didn’t reach his blue eyes. “I’m less me than Elizabeth is herself, though.” Hastily he added, “Not that I begrudge you that!”

“No, I get it.” Elizabeth stared down at her hands. “Now that I know I had been Ascended, it’s a bit odd to have a physical form again. And it’s even odder to know that it’s not my original one, even if it looks identical to it.”

“Down to the telomeres,” Carson agreed tiredly, drinking his tea afterwards as if to stop himself from saying more.

“Getting Carson back in any capacity was a miracle,” Lorne stressed. “Getting you back as well, Doctor Weir? That’s more than enough good luck to even out all the bad.”

“I’m not entirely unconvinced that what Michael had me do was the price for my supposed resurrection, though.”

“Listen, Radek and I have been over this with you: that was not your fault and you cannot be held responsible. Odds were that you weren’t even in your right mind most of the time when Michael was around.”

Carson went back to drinking his tea, clearly unconvinced. Knowing Carson and his guilt complex, Elizabeth suspected that he never would be. He and Rodney were alike that way. Reaching across the desk, Elizabeth grabbed the hand not holding the mug.

“Regardless of the precise circumstances, I am so happy to see you again, Carson. I didn’t expect to see you on this plane of existence ever again.”

“Aye, well, same to you,” he admitted. Putting down the mug, he laid his hand over hers to squeeze gently. “It is good to see you. I didn’t get to see you the other times.”

Elizabeth scrunched up her nose as she tried to think back. “I thought there was one time, where I looked like Fran…?”

“Oh, yeah, that was a clone type situation, where they deemed themselves expendable- which, by the way, Carson, you’re not allowed to do that,” Lorne quickly added on.

“I am not more important than other people,” Carson scowled.

“Wait, there were multiple clones of me?” Elizabeth wondered rather than trying to argue with the Scotsman.

“No,” went Lorne awkwardly. “One of you, and one of each of the primary away team.”

“At least I hear the two Rodneys got along better than the other time I heard about.” Carson suddenly shook his head wearily. “Good Lord, what the hell even are our lives that my best friend has met _himself_ multiple times?”

“Not boring?” Lorne laughed.

After a moment, Carson sighed, “I walked into that one.”

“That you did,” Elizabeth agreed.

A sergeant, not one Elizabeth recognized, appeared at the doorway. Lorne stood up and stepped just out of the office to speak with the younger woman. It was with a pang that Elizabeth realized that she was liable to encounter many expedition members she didn’t know. There was a large group that knew her- the party earlier had proven that- but there were likely even more that she didn’t. Some must have died, but hopefully more had just returned to Earth.

Carson gave her a sympathetic smile. With a start, Elizabeth conceded that he had undergone something similar upon his own return to Atlantis. Since he clearly had a heads-start on the process, she had to ask: “Is coming back worth it?”

With a honest smile, he told her, “It’s Atlantis and our friends- of course it is.”

Lorne stuck his head back in. “Sorry about that, the patrol got a bit antsy about the delay.”

Elizabeth didn’t flinch, but it was a near thing. The chat had been close enough to old times that she had forgotten her current circumstances. Hopefully being kept under guard would be temporary; Carson seemed to be trusted well enough, allowed even to go wandering the galaxy. Then again, he had never been part-Replicator. Finishing off her tea, Elizabeth placed the mug on the desk.

“Carson, thank you for sharing your tea and letting me visit.”

“Drop in most any time, Elizabeth,” he told her. “I really have missed you.”

She tried to smile, refraining from voicing her own grief about him. Now wasn’t the time to get into that. “I’ll take you up on that.”

Quietly she let herself by escorted out of the infirmary by the two soldiers, leaving behind Carson to resume his work. It hurt, being mistrusted after having been their leader, even if she understood the why of it. Elizabeth promised that she would earn back that trust and prove her mettle yet again. She hadn’t failed before, and she wasn’t about to start now. And she’d start by ensuring that John hadn’t become an overzealous guardian in her absence, firmly inserting doubt about if that had even been the case, firmly ignoring the events of the attempted Genii invasion.

Once in the guest quarters, Elizabeth went to the window to overlook her city. Despite what the IOA had made crystal clear, Elizabeth would not stop viewing Atlantis as _hers_. Moonlight glimmered off the waves and the towers; the sight always took her breath away, even though she had seen it thousands of times before. Then again, this was the first time she was seeing it with this form’s eyes, so perhaps the awe was justified.

Leaning against the sill, Elizabeth studied her beloved city, which seemed to have been kept in good order since her departure. Perhaps the ATA gene therapy hadn’t taken for her, but she still felt a connection to the city, if not as intimately as Lorne, let alone Rodney, Carson, and John (in that ascending order). Elizabeth smiled to herself at the unintended pun. Even with the restrictions, it was good to have been welcomed home by so many friends, including one that she had thought lost.

With a stretch, Elizabeth changed into her pajamas and got into the bed. There was something about Carson she needed to remember, but it was probably just another of those still-errant memories that she’d get back in time. Besides, she’d get another chance to speak with him soon when she had previously thought that would never happen again; it was possible that giddiness was all there was to this urge. Safe at home at long last, Elizabeth soon fell asleep.


End file.
